OddThinking

I can’t remember exactly how it started. I barely knew anyone at the party, and I couldn’t remember the name of the woman I was talking to. I think she made some slightly tipsy claim that she was very insightful – more insightful than me. I couldn’t let that boast go, so I challenged her back: “Oh, I don’t know. I’m pretty insightful,” I lied, “But how could I ever prove it?”

“I know,” she said, “Give me some insight into Kay,” she said pointing at the birthday girl, who off engrossed in a different conversation.

Uh oh. I had only spoken to Kay for a couple of minutes, and we didn’t really get much past the standard Sydney smalltalk of “What suburb do you live in?” Sydney society is based strongly on geography. She had made some snobby comment about “never crossing the bridge”.

How did I end up in a cold-reading situation again?

Wait up. I had had a much longer and deeper conversation with her husband, and he mentioned that the main reason that he didn’t move to a great job in Queensland was because his wife liked where they were in Sydney.

“Let’s see. I’ve only just met Kay tonight, and so I don’t know her well, but… Kay is a bit of a home-body. She likes to stay within her comfort zone. Oh, she is the queen of her own territory, but doesn’t like to stray out of it.”

The insightful woman went quiet and looked impressed; I had hit the nail on the head, and she hadn’t noticed the hammer was the size of a barn. That bought me time to try to remember some of Forer’s analysis. Dammit, I should memorise that thing for this situation. This was a unusual cold-reading situation though, because it was through a proxy. I couldn’t rely too much on subtly flattering the person and merely saying what Kay wanted to hear.

I could say something about puberty being tough; that’s a safe one, but this women had “only” known Kay from the age of 19. Today’s was Kay’s birthday; I could fold in some astrological crap. Wait, what star-sign was that? I have absolutely no idea! Ahh, I know! I could go with ‘independent thinker’.

“Kay certainly isn’t close-minded; she is open to new or controversial ideas, but she likes to see some strong evidence before she adopts them.”

My interlocutor looked thoughtful, and then her eyes changed. “You know what I think? I think you are full of bullshit.”

Dammit! She was insightful after all.